Into the West, as you can tell it is still winter in this picture. Kind of how I feel sometimes. When Jim's brother and sisters were leaving after his memorial service, his brother said I needed to "talk it out". And I have some. But how do you talk out 46 years of life with someone, with others. I tried it on face book with thoughts and pictures, helped a little but it seemed so trivial there. You couldn't really put your deepest sometimes darkest thoughts there. Though some do, I can't. Went to a support group that helped but the leader left for another position and that no longer exists. I have great and wonderful friends but they have lives and problems and some things I can't share even with them. I talk to Jim a lot and he sometimes answers. Have been paying more attention to my dreams and putting in my journal. I told my daughter when I am gone she can read it then "burn" it. So I reeeaally talk it out in my journal. And here, please be patient and understand what I put on this blog is really me talking to myself. With the hopes that who reads this will "hear" it and understand.

I read on the Internet (I no longer watch TV) that this one person feels we should not get married before we are 25 years old. Jim and I were 19. I know a 25 year old that will probably not be mature at 50, no judgement just an observation. So wake up people take responsibility for you own life, don't use what someone else said as a reason for your shortcomings. Wow now I am angry too. It is just that on June 14 it would have been 48 years that we were married. So what do I do? Work it out and "talk it out". (Did have a good conversation with my sister-in-law last evening). Happy Tuesday.